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What are the best Jewish jokes?

08.06.2025 09:20

What are the best Jewish jokes?

So the priest says:” Well if you’re not Catholic, why are you in here telling me all this?”

So a priests starts the confession and the man in the booth says “Father, I wanted to tell you, I’m 65 years old and last night, at the bar, I met two beautiful young 21 year old college girls. We talked a bit, drank a bit and one thing led to another and we ended up back at my place where the three of us stayed up all night drinking and having wild, uninhibited sex. “

And the priest thinks for a minute and then says:”Hmm, this is very serious my son, and there are a number of grave sins involved, so I’m not quite sure where to start. But let’s go with the basics: How long has it been since your last confession?”

Ive been pretending to be okay and acting as normal as possible, but Im actually completely heartbroken after a recent breakup. Its painful and really affecting me, to the point where I cant concentrate at work, Ive lost my appetite, I cant sleep, and It feels as if my whole world has been turned upside down. I loved him so much. He said so many cruel things to me and it made me realize he must not have loved me the way I loved him, or he wouldnt have said such horrible things. How do I handle the heartbreak and why cant I accept that he didnt love me and just forget about him?

the man replies: “Oh, I’ve never been to confession, I’m actually Jewish.”

I’m not sure if this one qualifies but I’ll tell it anyway.

And the man says : “Are you kidding me? I’m telling everyone.”

What is your wildest experience in Bangalore that you haven’t told anyone?